Written by Mr T.
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Friday, 3 July 2009

A week before his first visit to Russia, US President Barack Obama said that he thought Vladimir Putin should learn to 'Chillax'. Mr Obama stated how much he was looking forward to the trip and said that he had already asked Joe Biden to stock up Air Force One with a few road beers. Republicans have criticised Mr Obama for treating the visit as a bit of a works jolly.

'Chillax' is a combination of the words chill and relax. The Russian language does not have a word for chillax, the closest translation in Russian is "To cool your nut sack".

Mr Putin responded by saying "Maybe Mr Obama shouldn't criticise his host like that, and if he thinks he's getting the double quilted toilet paper now he's in for an unpleasant surprise". It was later clarified by Russian officials that Mr Putin's 'unpleasant surprise' was a reference to single quilted toilet paper, not a nuclear retaliatory strike.

When asked what was on the agenda for his trip to Russia Mr Obama deflected the question by saying "What happens in Moscow, stays in Moscow".

The gaff prone Vice President Joe Biden was less tactful however saying that he was going to "Rock out with his Cock out".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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