Rating:
Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 26 June 2009

image for Jackson's Hyperbaric Chamber Failed, Say Engineers
New, improved hyperbaric chamber tragically not completed in time to save Jacko.

LOS ANGELES, CA - The tragic loss of the King of Pop has been blamed on the mechanical failure of a crucial valve used to regulate the pressure in Jackson's hyperbaric chamber, say hydro-mechanical engineers who inspected the equipment earlier today.

The legendary pop icon had used one of the glass-encased medical devices since the early 90's, reportedly to help him maintain his youthful appearance.

Doctors believe the valve that failed let pressure in the chamber decrease dangerously while Jackson slept, inhibiting the ability of his red blood cells to absorb oxygen, which forced his heart to work harder, triggering the superstar's later cardiac arrest.

Upon hearing this latest news, MacCauley Culkin publicly vowed to sue EZ-Rest Hyperbaric Chambers, Inc. "into oblivion."

Make The San Francisco Onion's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!


More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 multiplied by 4?

5 24 8 21
58 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience on our website, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more