New York - (Where's the Beef? Ass Mess): "Brain-dead idiot, they promised she'd be dripping in hundreds of carats of flawless diamonds!"
Thus Che Guevara's relatives complained today after seeing naked pictures of the Cuban revolutionary's granddaughter Lydia festooned with, er, lots of extremely valuable carrots.
The former Russell Brand squeeze's red-blooded meat-eater relations remain livid after the 24 year-old has posed starkers for veggie wingnuts PETA.
"Maybe it's a symptom of the English Mad Cow Disease," great-aunt Gladys Guevara commented, "caught from that beardie pervert-shagger comic."
But Little Ms Lydia is unrepentant:
"Go screw yourselves you ugly dog-eating scum," was her only reply to a barrage of press questions.
Heather Mills is 69.