Written by Wire Piddle
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Tuesday, 2 June 2009

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Kim Jong Yung-un, North Korea's Next Leader

Kim Jong-il's third son, Kim Jong Yung-un is to become North Korea's next leader. Born in the early 1980's, Yung-un was not thought to fit the mold of the average communist dictator slash tyrant.

"Actually if you think of it in American terms, our new leader would have been called a 'black sheep'.' stated an unidentified government source who didn't want to release his name for fear of having his head cut off.

"Kim Jong Yung-un left the family home at an early age and moved to a trailer park on Mount Kumgang where he hunted small rodents, fished, grew his own vegetables and robbed South Korean tourists of their valuables, much like a highwayman would have done during Elizabethan times in Great Britain." exclaimed the unidentified source who didn't want to release his name lest it bring untold misery to his close relatives through government torture and intimidation.

"After a while, though, Yung-un got tired of this life and became a film director for the state where he made several historically important blockbusters such as 'Jaws', 'Close Encounters of The Third Kind' and, of course, 'Schindler's List'.

"Just a thought,' this reporter countered, 'but those films were made by Steven Spielberg.'

The source, who wouldn't reveal his name for fear that his childhood village would be burned to the ground and all the elders drowned in a huge vat of battery acid, responded by saying that he was aware that there was a controversy regarding who, indeed, had made those classics, although he was quite certain that they were the brainchild of none-other than Kim Jong Yung-un but everyone was entitled to their opinion.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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