Written by Jaggedone
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Topics: Africa, Somalia

Friday, 22 May 2009

image for UN order a gigantic saw for cutting off Somalia from Africa
Somalian refugees in the greatest human exodus ever since Moses cocked it all up

After non-stop wars, conflicts, starvation, raping of innocent refugees and no possible end to the misery suffered by Somalia's population, the UN have made a majority decision to cut the shit-hole off of the African continent and then let a man-made Tsunami do do the rest!

A gigantic mechanical saw (manufactured by German/Japanese industrial giants Siemens/Panasonic Corp) is currently on containers waiting to get unloaded off of the Kenyan coast, from there it will transported to the Somalian border, constructed and sawing will begin a.s.a.p.

All innocent Somalians caught up in the endless conflicts will be given up till 31.08.09 to exodus the country when deep sawing will begin.

The whole Somalian border will be cut away from the African mainland causing a massive deep canal. The canal will then be flooded with sea water, afterwards the man-made Tsunami will take care of the rest (hopefully!)

UN Secretary Ban Ki-moon announced the reasons for this drastic solution:

"We at the UN are sick to fucking death of the on-going conflicts which have made Somalia a lawless country. We have spent trillions in attempting to save the country from its never ending misery and now the only solution possible is to sink the shit-hole." "So instead of the Germans, US, Brits, France, China, Japan, etc, pumping the place full of weapons we have decided to utilise their industrial expertise in a positive fashion, build this gigantic saw, and get rid of the dump forever!"

"We have come to a unanimous, ultimate decision, also we hope those renegade Somalian pirates will be caught up in the massive tsunami ridding the planet of the scum."

Sawing is expected to start on the 31.08.09 and be completed by December 2009, hopefully on New years Eve so we can have a massive, global firework display to celebrate the event!

Future plans to implement the same policies for other rogue, lawless countries are in place, so beware corrupt, mafia-run Russia, your name is also on the list!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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