Written by Morse
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: Poo, Joseph Biden

Tuesday, 19 May 2009

image for Biden Forced to Admit Stool Sample He Submitted for Exam Belonged to Someone Else!
"We all laughed,listening to Joe gruntin' tryin to pass that stool exam!" HS Friend Tells The Spoof!

Dover, Delaware/ Forensenic Cold Case Files - "When it rains it pours...and then it rains some more and you feel like you're being water boarded as the Truth continues to catch up with you," those were the words uttered by VP Joe Biden as the shit storm continued to swirl around the most verbally challenged VP since Spiro Agnew!

Biden watchers felt things couldn't get any worse since he had declared Barack Obama a "clean, articulate black man" early last year, but they have been proven wrong at least a dozen times since then, but thanks are due to the friendly Washington press corp, whithout which the body count could be more. Much More!

Today another dead body emerged from Biden's past, an event so vile, even his wife Jilly was left aghast at the Audacity of the Dope. (her words, not this writer)

The deed goes back to Biden's final year in high school where he wasn't quite good enough to make the College Prep classes, and was relegated to a series of Vo Tech type "learn a trade and stay off the street" variety of exercises..

Boyhood friend Iggy "Sketch" Flannerty tells it best. "Well, it was like this. Joey was really struggling to get through the last semester, and he couldn't wait to get out and get into Politics where he didn't need much of an education.

It was our last project at the school....you know, there was a lot of drugs in our school, even then, and Joe would be required to provide a stool sample as part of the final exam to pass, so to speak."

"Now Joey could always talk. Talk a lot, he did, never did make much sense, and most of the time us mutts just laughed at him, but we liked havin' 'em around for shits and giggles. But now this stool sample....try as he might he just couldn't get it to come out right. We listened to him struggle. He grunted, he sweated, he groaned....finally he just fuckin' gave up."

"Well, we felt bad and got aholt of Fat Freddy Polinsky...now there was a mountain of a man, even at his age. For a fiver he agreed to supply Joey with a stool sample guaranteed to give him a passing grade. We all even chipped in, that's how dead ass broke old Joey was in those days...even got fired as a bag boy for sayin' the wrong thing baggin' groceries at the Grand Union."

"We all remember onst he got done baggin' two boxes of sanitary napkins for Sister Katherine and he asked all friendly like, "you on the rag again, Sister?"

"That was our Joey. Hasn't changed much, fer as I can see, don't cha know?

"Anyway, Joey got his stool sample from Fat Freddy and he passed the exam with flying colors....best stool sample ever submitted according to the teacher. Course none of us know what ever happened to the original stool sample he worked so hard on....never could get those three legs cut off even in that friggin' shop class!"

"And that's how Joey got through HS. He'd shit if he knew I told ya...but what the hell....the man always could laugh at himself and look where he is now!"

More when we stop laughing. Stay tuned for Additional Biden Chronicles!

Make Morse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 plus 1?

7 14 4 2

Go to top