NEW YORK CITY - Business mogul Donald Trump, who owns the Miss USA Pageant, has said that the questionable pictures of Carrie Prejean (Miss California) although somewhat risque are acceptable for viewing by all family members at family picnics, reunions, and Bar Mitzvahs.
Trump said that he has seen more skin exposed in Sears Roebuck Catalogs.
He then added that during some of his recent Celebrity Apprentice episodes ex-Playboy playmate Brande Roderick exposed more smooth milky-white skin than Joan and Melissa Rivers, Annie Duke, Andrew Dice-Clay, and Khloe Kardashian all put together.
The 21-year-old Miss California has modeled for Sak's Fifth Avenue, Log Cabin Syrup, Bloomingdales, and Taco Bell.
The Takasooki Toy Company of Ireland has even put out a Carrie Prejean Bobblehead Doll. And the interesting thing about his bobblehead doll, is that unlike other such dolls, Miss California's bamboochas (chumbawumbas) also bobble.
The Trumpster says that he wants everyone to get off of Prejean's back because she is starting to develop signs of first degree stress, second degree bulimia, and third degree ignorance.
He said that the lovely liltingly luscious Carrie has received thousands of negative emails.
He added that he has seen all of the negative emails and he said that 47 were from Ellen DeGeneres, 34 were from Rosie O'Donnell, 29 were from Melissa Etheridge, 3 were from Ann Coulter, and 2 were from Mary Cheney (Dick "The Dick" Cheney's daughter).
Trump was asked what he thought about the fact that his pageant association had paid for Prejean's silicon breast implants?
He was dumbfounded. And he asked "I paid for her what?"
He was told that he had paid for Carrie Prejean's majonkers.
"Majonkers? What the hell are majonkers?"
He was told that majonkers were bazoongies. Trump laughed so hard his hair did the stadium wave.
He regained his composure and asked what in the world had happened to the old-fashioned words for tits?
Words like cupcakes, niblets, snuggle pups, sweater treats, and vavooms?
He was told that they had been replaced by words like jigglers, doo dahs, mangoes, and speed bumps.
In a somewhat related story. Speaking of a couple of boobs; Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld have co-authored a book about their days in President Bush's administration.
The book is titled, The Bush White House Was Kinda Like Being At The Ringling Brothers and Barnum and Bailey Circus; Except For No Elephants, But Plenty of Clowns.