Written by Bluebella
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Topics: George W. Bush

Thursday, 7 May 2009

image for George Bush learning how to read and write
George Bush actually doesn't know how to turn a computer on, but loves to pose for pictures

Washington DC - Former President of the US, George Bush is learning how to read and write.

Three months after handing over the presidency, Bush has now been told he no longer will have a secretary paid for by the state and will require to read and write his own material.

The former president will engage in one on one lessons with a private tutor, rather than group sessions.

Bush has admitted it will be a hard process, and a feat that will not come easy to him. Despite being president of the USA for eight years and a politician for four decades prior to that, Bush has never known how to read and write. He dropped the subject when he was in grade school to concentrate on more important subjects such as How to Invade a Country, How to Ruin the Global Economy and How to Fix Votes.

It is not really known how Bush became President without having to do a spelling and grammar test - in fact it is not really known how Bush became President at all. It is suspected that in both cases, nepitism may have been involved.

During the learning process, Bush will start with the simplest words such as "a, the, and, with, fiscal stimulus" - practical words people use every day. He is expected to have learned how to write "a cat sat on the mat" by the end of the month, and will be able to read the first of the Mr Men book series within six weeks.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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