Laredo,Texas - Billy Bob Figges,US Border Guard and lay Methodist preacher,today revealed his own personal theory on the cause of the Mexican flu outbreak.
"Makes sense to me" drawled Figges, who is known to Mexicans and the local Latino community as "El Bastardo", this being one of the more printable nicknames he is called.
"Yes suh. Those Mexicans falls into the river, they gets wet,they catches cold but this time its turned into the flu.Its the will of the Lord."
When asked if he believed that all 20 million inhabitants of Mexico City were failed illegal immigrants, Billy Bob replied with disarming sincerity: "Yes suh, I do. The very fact that they's still livin in Mexco automatically means theys failed wetbacks."
When I objected to the use of the word "wetback" Figges, 51, shot me in the thigh.