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Topics: Australia

Wednesday, 15 April 2009

image for Sydney Reopens Drug "Shooting Gallery", Suicide Center
Sydney Improves City's Image

In Sydney, Australia, it's back to sponsoring it's legal "shooting gallery" - a safe indoor place for addicts to inject drugs. This was tried several years back and ended in a complete shamble as druggies ran riot.

Not just content with "shooting up", several began shooting each other, only with bullets.

The new facility will be located in the city's Kings Cross nightclub district once again but with a few policemen checking in from time to time but not to make arrests unless "somebody's about to get hurt".

Once again the facility will be run by the Catholic Order the Sisters of Smack and St. Crack's Hospital.

"The point about this is to get heroin use off the streets," said New South Wales Premier Otto Vandersal.

Also opening nearby, a suicide center at Our Lady Of The Pill.

Maybe this will get the chalk lines off the street, from jumpers.

"Those things look awful with tourists around", stated Police Chief Reynolds Miller, "Even though lately, we've been using pastels."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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