Written by rfreed
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: CIA, intelligence, mossad, KGB, mi6

Friday, 3 April 2009

image for Spy 'Intelligence' Agencies Given New Names
Once Known As The 'Central Intelligence Agency'; Now Known As The 'Cravenly Immoral Agency'.

Intelligence agencies around the world have been renaming themselves 'Egoist Self-Interest Agencies' which it has been agreed upon is a more accurate term. The use of the term 'Intelligence' infers that an individual or group is acting at the highest capacity of the mind and consciousness in its actions.

Investigations have determined that literally all 'Intelligence Agencies' around the world, including the CIA, MI6, Moshad, the KGB, etc. never, if ever rise beyond the the selfish short sightedness of the agencies own comfort interests and those of the nation itself secondly.

It is in lieu of this that they have been attributed the new designation of ESSCA, although some have adopted the moniker 'Egocentric Self-Serving Callous Agency' instead. Although the agencies must often work with scanty evidence in their profession, the evidence of the truth in these titles was common to everyone.

Some of the officials of the spy agencies around the world have protested that the new titles were demeaning and not as sexy or respectful as being called "Intelligence' agencies, but when presented with the evidence that their past actions indicated that they were incapable of acting out of any other motivation than self interest was damning.

This evidence includes the CIA's constant snuffing out of independence movements in Central and South American countries, M16's aid in dividing up the Middle East into artificial borders following WWI that helped to cause the modern day struggles, Moshad's constant undermining of any economic or freedom progress of the Palestinian state, and the KGB's buggering around with just about anything that moves.

On the other side of things an award should be given to Luxembourg's 'Intelligence' agency which doesn't bother with anyone and seems to spend most of its time sitting around playing cards and watching football on the tube.

Make rfreed's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 4?

3 15 16 22

Go to top