Amstetten, Austria - (Sordid Third Reich Mess): "Ja, Eva Braun was my mother and taught me all the dark arts a man could ever need," Austrian dungeon master Joseph Fritzl told the judge today.
A hushed courtroom then heard how that Fritzl used Berlin bunker blueprints inherited from Braun to booby-trap the cellar door with Zyklon-B poison gas and a high voltage electric current.
"Vorsprung durch Technik!" Fritzl explained to a mystified jury, "nothing beats German craftsmanship!"
Fritzl 69, is on trial for rape, incest, false imprisonment and coercion charges after decades of lurid sex rampages that make the Marquis de Sade look like a rank amateur.
The case is expected to end by Good Friday.