Written by Pointer
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Topics: Pope, Vatican, Africa

Monday, 16 March 2009

image for Pope Moves Vatican to Africa
The New African Catholic Church will serve communion with a choice of fingers or toes on the side

The once radical Jesus movement attracted followers and created enemies because of its progressive views concerning human dignity, women's rights and social justice. The cosmopolitan city of Rome became a center in the new worldview.

And it came to pass in the Papacy of Benedict XVIII, that an arch conservative splinter group was invited back into the fold despite one of its leaders being a Holocaust denier. Another recently appointed shepherd believes in a God that sends hurricanes to punish NOLA jazz. Benedict's interpretation of the gospel message denies women ordination, gay's respect and loves the frozen embryo and the fetus more than born people.

Benedict himself cited these central doctrines of the Catholic cult as reason to abandon the eternal city

Romans contracept more than Mormons procreate (like good Catholics used to). The new pagan Rome, Europe and the western world have become hostile territory and so we will move the Chair of Peter to a more supportive environment. Africans hate gays and oppress women just like we do. Some argue that there are still cannibals in Africa...I say we eat the body of Christ daily and twice on Sunday!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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