Written by carlito
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Saturday, 7 March 2009

image for Gary Glitter mistakingly signs up for euthanasia
the Swiss clinic at work

Paul Gadd known by his self styled moniker Sir Gary of Glitter was last night locked in legal talks with a Swiss firm to try to break a legally binding contract.

The 'leader of the chain gang' signed the contract on Friday morning with the Swiss health company but almost immediately issued a writ against the neutral firm.

A spokesman for the firm confirmed Glitters legal team had started proceedings to sue on the basis of false advertising. Hans Van Belta said "our conscience is clear, during negotiations we offered Mr Gadd guaranteed euthanasia without the threat of prosecution or indeed any legal action, he was most insistent on this as he said he had encountered problems in the past. Mr Gadd signed the papers before stating he prefers Orientals - we presumed he meant doctors and seeing as though we have three excellent Chinese doctors we agreed to the request".

It is thought Mr Gadd was unhappy with the some of the wording of the contract put in front of him but signed it anyway because he was far too excited to see properly. It is thought the problem came to light when his solicitors read a faxed copy and instructed Gadd to use what ever methods possible to break the contract before Friday 13th March or suffer as they put it "the most serious of ramifications".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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