Written by Illusnist
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Tuesday, 17 March 2009

image for Easter Cutbacks Planned
Chocolate egg laying bunnies can't put out in the economic slump.

Standing amidst a field of tulips and lilies, Peter Cottontail made an unprecedented public appearance today to announce yet another disheartening round of bad news for the ailing economy. Rising prices for sugar and spice and all things nice have sent expected Easter chocolate demands to new lows, and today's announcement is the most devastating so far to world obesity quotas.

"Eh, what's up Doc?" Peter Cottontail quipped while nibbling a carrot at the outset of his appearance. The situation soon became serious, however, as he announced the lay off of three thousand chocolate egg processors, plus reduced workdays for bunnies posing for both the hollow and solid chocolate bunny molds. Candy corn and marshmallow chicks are likely to be short supply in many areas, and deliveries of colored easter eggs are expected to last well into the early morning hours of Easter Sunday, perhaps not finishing up until the children have already awakened.

Hardest hit of all, it was revealed at the close of the announcement, are the specially trained bunnies which lay tiny football shaped chocolate eggs. The economic stress has made it difficult to lay eggs, and many eggs are being laid without their customarily metallic outer shells, and melting on the spot where they were born.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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