Written by Monkey Woods
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Wednesday, 7 January 2009

image for Gaza Strip Residents Fed Up Of Being Linked With Paul Gascoigne
Gaza City coach Sharma

Palastinian residents of the Gaza Strip have told UN officials that, as well as the constant aerial bombardment from Israel that they are having to put up with, they are also "very concerned" about being linked with ex-Newcastle United and England footballer, Paul 'Gazza' Gascoigne.

Israel has been bombing the shit out of Gaza for over a week now, to try and flush out the pesky Hamas rocket-launchers who are hiding in the area. Lack of food, potable water supplies and essential medecines has brought Gaza to its knees, and leaders say this is one slur they could have done without.

Mohsin Sharma, who lives in Gaza City, and coaches them, said:

"Gazza was a good player, but he was also a joker. All that booze and the 'hitting his wife' stuff - it's too much. We resent being linked with Mr Gascoigne, and would ask everyone to realise that there is only one 'z' in Gaza Strip."

Paul Gascoigne, the real Gazza, was unavailable for comment, as he is locked up somewhere.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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