Tel Aviv - (Sorry Ass Mess): The Israeli secret intelligence service is hopping mad after Off-the-Wall-St trader Bernard Madoff lost 95% of the Mossad's pension fund in his $50 billion hedge fund collapse.
"How come we didn't see this one coming?" the intelligence (sic) agency's CEO raged today after being told the Madoff Ponzi scam was modelled on Mossad's very own 1980s blueprint for bringing down OPEC securities.
Madoff, 69, is said to have asked for FBI protection after rumors of irate Israeli spooks sending out a posse to 'nail his thieving ass' for the pyramid scheme.
The CIA meanwhile is probing his hedge fund fantasy factory to 2002 Iraq WMD fiction production.
Reports that ex-UK Prime Monster Tony Blair has also lost his entire pension annuity fund in the Madoff collapse are at boiling point in Whitehall.
Valerie Plame is one smug bitch.