Written by Aspartame Boy
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Topics: Golf, Aspartame, donkey

Saturday, 29 November 2008

image for Aspartame Helps Tame Donkeys Used to Pull Golf Carts
Me about to tee off at the Tibet golf course, Donkee Cong

TIBET - Aspartame controversy aside, new facts from Tibet reveal where the name aspartame (pronounced "ASS" "par" "tame") came from. When golf became quite popular in Tibet in 1970, there was just one problem. No golf carts. But, there were plenty of donkeys.

"The problem was, the donkeys were quite wild. They would bite the golfers and eat the golf balls. It was hard to shoot par under these conditions", quipped Shodee Gulfpro Dunkeeman, of Tibet.

"Golfers would often throw their clubs off the mountain. People were getting injured. We had to do something. So we called Corpsemountain Chemical Company, which in English means pile of dead bodies. They gave us this chemical that we can't remember the name of to feed the wild donkeys. Now the asses are tame, and the golfers shoot par. So, we just called it asspartame. We dropped the extra s, because that would be three consonants in a row.. a no no.", Shodee concluded.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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