Written by Morse
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Sunday, 23 November 2008

image for Gore Adapts Finnish M/05 Camouflage Apparel to Support Global WarmingTheory: Disappears Into Political Backround!
Al Gore to Supporters:"Can You See Me Now?"

Helsinki/ Reuters - Once again the Human Sausage, Al Gore, leads the way to promote his vision of the consequences of Global Warming. His latest marketing ploy is to become the spokesman for Finnish Camouflage clothing utilizing the patented M/05 pattern based on digital photos of rutting Moose wallowing in the little known swamp of the Suomi wild life domain.

Recently donning his 3 piece "Suomi" suit, the inflated ex Presidential candidate morphed into a moose like image indistinguishable from the rest of his cud chewing herd.

Designed for "Outdoor Use" exclusively, the manufacturer warning label states "Not for use in Alaska, May Cause Death or Traumatic Injury to Wearer." The disclaimer goes on to state other potential side effects such as liver damage, constipation, fainting, flatulence, and excessive public speaking.

The manufacturer, enthused over recent recognition to the product due to the Gore publicity, is busy in R&D developing other camouflage patterns.
Here are some of the latest under consideration:

  • M/06 Digital recreation of a Venus Fly Trap: Spokesperson Monica Lewinsky
  • M/07 Digital recreation of Man Killing Black Widow Spider: by Brittney Speers
  • M/08 Digital recreation of Shaka Zulu Warrior: rotating cast of corrupt inner city Mayors

Gore hopes to reclaim credibility after his recent "whoops" created problems with claims that temperatures had risen throughout Europe in a report from NASA, one of 4 reporting agencies.

Seems that Tipper had inadvertently faxed a copy of his daily rectal thermometer readings to NASA instead of to his Proctologist!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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