Written by Judge Retort
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Thursday, 30 October 2008

image for Starbucks' business may have bottomed
Sarah Palin before her morning Starbucks.

A top executive explained that Starbucks' business had become as black and burnt out as the sludge at the bottom of a cup that's been left up on a commuter's dashboard in the sun all weekend.

He further added that dealing with the many store closures during the recent international economic volatility had left top executives as burnt as the taste of the coffee itself.

The CEO was completely steamed and denied that he was milking the company or its products. He loudly proclaimed: "The cup is NOT half-empty, it is half-FULL...and filling up! And the refill his free! Yeah, you'll have to wait a while -- there are many others already in line for the free money of the Wall Street bailout. The damned line extends all the way outside the United States Treasury!"

He referred to the long line of supplicants from financial institutions awaiting their morning Treasury bailout latté - each demanding a triplé-grandé. The line indeed stretched on and on for miles all over Washington DC. -- a Starbucks representative, however, strategically located at every block.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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