London - Madonna re-announced her divorce today, citing the lack of publicity from her latest album forcing her to take action. She also announced her immediate engagement to the dwarf actor who played Mini-Me in the Austin Powers movies.
"He's so different from the movie," said Madonna, "He's very hairy and boy can he vibrate! That's important in a marriage."
The actor's name is actually Verne Troyer and he has been a fan of Madonna's only recently, "I really didn't know who she was, I only listen to Frank Sinatra, so naturally I didn't like her at all, but when we met....it was like some kind of bomb went off in my body, I was on fire."
When asked if he was afraid he was just catching her on the rebound from her marriage Verne said, "Hey when your not even 4 feet tall you don't ask stupid questions, you take it when you can get it, and boy does she got it!"
Madonna added, "He's just the perfect size, I can even carry him around on stage while I'm singin'."
Ah love is Bliss.