Adelaide, Australia/ Lesbian Times - A free lance writer with dual citizenship in this country and the UK claims he was held captive by a band of Lesbians in this small town and forced to father over 30 children in a 2 week span.
The unnamed sperm donor said he had originally signed up for a "Sex Tour of Thailand", but that recent political unrest in that country had terminated those plans and he chose to Holiday in Australia. "Let me tell you, Mate, I got more than I bargained for. It was quite a workout, and my carpeltunnel syndrome is acting up something fierce! Luckily I am a Cricket switch hitter at the Wicket or my right hand would have fallen off from overwork!"
The saga started when the victim stopped to ask directions in the quaint town, and while distracted by a quite attractive, long winded , long haired, long legged lassie diagraming directions to the local pub in the one block town, he was gang tackled from behind and dragged off to an undisclosed location.
It was only later as he lay in sexual isolation living off oysters, ground buffalo horn, and reconstituted Viagra, and forced to watch monkeys wanking off at the zoo, that he realized he hadn't seen any men around town after he had gotten off the bus. (ed.note: see Bus Trip in Discussion Forum)
The Australian Tourist Bureau and the country' embassy say they have permanent warnings posted on their sites regarding the militant activities of the all women town and suggested no tourist travel to the area "unless you are a real WANKER!"
The victim said he didn't own a computer and got most of his pornography from pictorial tabloids or The Guardian, and was therefore ignorant of the inherent dangers.
The victim also said he was able to save himself "after being drained dry" when the women managed to capture a ranking US Congressman on the House Banking Committee during a financial junket, and lost interest in the original victim.
"I knew I only had about 15 minutes before the gals realized the guy was a real Bugger and took out their anger on me," the victim said. "I managed to dig my out by tunneling under the walls of my dirt floor hut, stole a motor bike and made it out the the main highway and got picked up by a trucker heading back to Sydney."
Authorities say the escape was miraculous, as dozens of other male tourists known to have stumbled on the town were never seen again. Apparently this form of sexual abuse has been going on for over two decades.
A flying squad of Aussie Sex police, looking for another missing tourist last year, said that there were hundreds of kids with big heads, pointy teeth and playing banjos performing up and down main street. Darwin Lives!