Swedes by the tens of thousands are once again threatening to conquer the rest of Europe!
This resurgence of vikingism is in response to the recent threat of invasion of globalizationists from the European Union, intent on globalizing Sweden through government mandated brunette hair coloring, brown contact lenses, and forced plastic surgery to lower those endearing high cheek bones. All this, to force Swedes down from their lofty throne of stunning blonde golden beauty, in order to join the rest of the brown-eyed world.
"Yah! You wouldn't let our Viking ancestors conquer you, so vhy shoult ve let you conquer us?!" railed protestor Thor Icelicker. He further cried: "Yah! They can take our golden good looks - but they will NEVER take hour horned helmets!"
In retaliation, hundreds of long-boats pushed off from Stockholm bound for Spain, with cargo holds loaded with bleach.