Written by Morse
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Saturday, 27 September 2008

image for Frenchman Honors Historic Rudolph Hess Freedom Flight to UK!
Spandau Prison:next landing for Flying Frog?

Calais,France / Reuters - Not since the electrifying flight of Nazi Rudolph Hess to Scotland in 1941 has a dare devil flight excited the masses in the UK like the feat of French Flyer Yves Rossy.

"The Flying Frog", as he has been tabbed by UK tabloids, completed his dramatic flight by parachuting into the UK , much like earlier history maker, Hess, who jumped from his ME110 to bring his message of Peace to the Brits.

Like Hess, Rossy was immediately taken from the cheering throng by MI5 agents and whisked away to an unknown destination despite protestations that he brought peaceful greetings from EU President Nicolas Sarkozy.

The landing area was cordoned off and Rossy's homemade craft was examined and photographed in painstaking detail. The wings, observers noted, were of carbon fiber, reinforced with Super Glue. No propulsion element was noted on site, but a short distance away, what appeared to be some sort of Jet Propulsion Suppository, including an anal ejection device has been located and been recovered by the HZMAT unit experienced in dealing with shit like that.

The high flyer left from Calais aboard a mother ship and exited same at 8200 feet, allowing his make shift wings to glide for a period of time before igniting his Suppository, a painstaking operation relying on remarkable ability of being able to light a fart with a Zippo lighter at 125 MPH.

Possessing a larger than normal rectum, for which he had been in training for some time, the oversized fuel cell enabled him to fly for the remarkable period of 13 minutes to cover the 21 miles. "Right, then," he was heard to say,"not much worse than taking a recreational enema, Mate!"

Rossy was first spotted buzzing the Foreskin Lighthouse prior to passing the White Cliffs, and finally activated his chute and expelled his power plant at the same time. Both came to a safe landing.

Rossy claimed the design of the craft was his own, but technical drawings of the propulsion system were apparently hacked from a Florida NASA scientist only identified so far as "Buck". Investigations will continue, according to officials.

Meanwhile, Russian diplomats are meeting at Downing Street discussing which months they want to be on duty at Spandau Prison alternating with other NATO officials to guard the clever Frog. "A full cavity search will be undertaken in case the clever bugger has anything else up there" an Inspector said.

Make Morse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 3?

1 5 12 7
67 readers are online right now!

Go to top