Written by SophieFigon
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Topics: Sarah Palin

Thursday, 4 September 2008

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The comedian Sarah Palin has successfully completed the final show in her one-night tour at the Republican National Convention, notorious for its often frosty receptions.

Palin managed to win the rowdy crowd over(complete with pink fur-lined stetsons)by her now infamous down-to-earth, some would say hockey mum-ish, comedy.

Many subjects were the object of Palin's mockery including teenage pregnancy, presidential candidate John "oven-chips" McCain, baked alaskas and the British town of Bristol.

One example of her hilarious wit was this classic joke from her repertoire:

"What's the difference between a hockey mum and a bulldog? Hockey mums wear lipstick".

Genius.

The Minneapolis crowd were rupturous in their applause and there were even shouts of "encore" and "bet you couldn't tell me where Luxemburg is" coming from the exuberant audience.

After ignoring the latter request, Palin answered her people with the ever popular "Lumberjack song" written by an unamed lumberjack in Hayward, Wisconsin during the strikes and unionization efforts in the early 20th century. Based on true events, it tells the story of one lumberjack and his desire to dress more like his wife and a little less, well, like a lumberjack.

While crowds were loving the sing-along, back in the UK press, Palin's brother Michael was still trying to drum up support by travelling across to Eastern Europe (now known as "New Europe"). The deputy prime minister candidate visited many villages in little-known countries such as Russia and the Ukraine, the small but vital countries that might just win the election for him (not that they are entitled to vote of course).

"Of course, there is no actual reason for me to be here, apart from the fantastic publicity that it's giving me. Oh, you want to know about my sister? Sorry. Well, yes, she's er....done rather well for herself hasn't she? I mean, it's pretty difficult touring for months for a start, I wouldn't know anything about that, or comedy for that matter. It was one-night only in Minneapolis? Well that's a different matter entirely."

Brother and sister are soon to reunited though, at the 164th Accountancy Convention held as ever, by that most interesting of men, Arthur Putey. For our own health, we refused to go to him for comment.

The next few months will be crutial for both Palins and after both of their successes, this may be hard to follow.

Though I think they just might. If they're lucky. VERY lucky. Luckier than Prince Regent when his dad died.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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