Written by Clifford Rutley
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Topics: Olympics

Thursday, 4 September 2008

image for Olympic Face Sitting Continues
Worship it!

As we reported back in July the new olympic sport of face sitting started way before the rest of the games as it was expected to last much longer than the rest of the tournament. Well, we can now tell you that the final three countries are now in a head to head battle for the gold, silver and bronze medals.

Sweden is still in there with three of their twenty young blonds still having their bottoms planted firmly on the faces of some men from Japan. They are still expected to win as their Japanese face chairs are all from some ancient kamikaze sect that has mastered the art of living underneath other people, while they fart on them.

The Vietnamese team is favorites for the silver medal, with two of them still in the competition; their tight behinds nestled comfortably on top of the faces of two blokes from the Australian outback.

The surprise of the tournament has been the twenty stone fat women from Chicago. She is the only remaining member of the US team and rumors are going around that the bloke from India that she sat on the face of has died. The only problem is, he can't be seen under all the cellulite and so confirming this is difficult.

The only question everyone is now asking is when did he die, if he did? Some seem to think it was within seconds of the twenty stone woman's first fart, about ten minutes into the competition.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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