Written by shea lo
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Tuesday, 2 September 2008

image for Bristol Palin Baby's daddy Levi Johnston to be offered huge deal to play with Vancouver Canucks!

DIDJUNEAU - ALASKA: Levi Johnston, the 18-year old, self-proclaimed 'Redneck" and father of Rep-Veep Sarah Palin's soon-to-be born grandchild was offered a 2-year 20 million US$ deal by the Vancouver Canucks.

Said Canuck GM Mike Gillis, "We're tired of waiting on that procrastinating Swede Sundin. His loss is LJ's gain".

Questioned by a fulminating, overweight and out-of-shape Vancouver media on a risky choice. Gillis said: "Have you seen this guy? He's Sex on Skates; he's another Todd Bertuzzi in the making. We need wild, horny, hormonally charged dudes on our team if we want to make the Cup. Levi was there for the asking".

The newly-minted millionaire himself wasn't saying much but his handlers referred all media questions to Levi Johnston's MySpace page in which he describes himself as a f***ing redneck.

The McCain campaign called him an "articulate young man who is not afraid to express himself. The MySpace description is a typo. What Levi meant is that he is a puck-ing redneck'- a rarely used hockey term.

The Vancouver Canucks will open their season with LJ in the line-up.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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