The World Health Organisation has today announced that "a minutes silence" does in fact have profound healing properties. The minutes silence, traditionally used for Remembrance Ceremonies to show respect for the dead, has now been adopted for other occasions such as "remembering the living" and "evoking the recently crashed."
Following the latest endorsement by The World Health Organisation, which stated that the majority of people remaining silent for a full minute felt "better", with just one or two feeling "uncomfortable" and very occasionally feeling "an urge to shout" it had been proposed that "a minutes silence" should be scheduled in at least once a day for the wellbeing of the Nation.
A recent recommendation that the "minutes silence" should follow a tea break for maximum effect, was rejected by Union leaders fearful that employers would deduct the minute from official breaks.
A spokesman for the World Health Organisation was unable to comment today as he was "choosing to observe a minutes silence" in advance of any disaster which may take place tomorrow.