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Monday, 18 August 2008

image for Obama Proposes US Join EU; Sarkozy Agrees and Wets Himself

PARIS/Reuters - Continuing his world wide educational tour, Democratic Presidential hopeful Barack Obama proposed that the US join the EU to further enhance his vision of universal love and stateless people crisscrossing borders at will to spread their political, religious, and economic dogma.

French President Nicolas Sarkozy responded effusively to the self proclaimed next President of the United States' proposal, refering to him as "my dear", and proclaiming to the crowd of EU immigrants that "the French people love the Americans" and that Obama's quest for the Presidency "is a story which speaks to the heart....and to the heart of Europeans." As of today, most French citizens hadn't heard of the comments as they were on yet another holiday, but the comments were received favorably by most of the non-French and English speaking audience who were on their way to market and prayers.

Obama said EU membership was a win-win for the Democratic Party and the Senator enabling his world wide constituients to travel at will and register to vote in the US thereby ensuring at least two Presidential terms for Obama, and complete domination for the Democratic Party for the foreseable future.

Back in the US, Senators Nancy Polosi and Harry Reid, Democratic leaders of Congress, indicated thely would be adding an earmark to the EU application to make sure Mexico could ride into the EU on the US's coat tails.

Members of the EU governing body breathed a sigh of relief, as US membership would enable them to escape a few current sticky wickets. By accepting US membership they could hold off the application of Turkey to join the union, and at the same time expel pesky Ireland, and thereby regain control of future policy for the 27 member union.

The EU, which started with 6 member states in the 1950's prides itself that citizens of members can travel, live and work without being subject to border controls or time consuming paperwork which would tend to confirm individual's identities.

Obama said he would be able to reduce the national budget in half after the the US is accepted into the union. " There will no longer be a need for the Office of Homeland Security, the FBI, the IRS, the Border Patrol and other agencies of that ilk, everyone will be free to do whatever they want. "

To seal the deal, and as a further gesture of good will, Obama said he will be returning the Statue of Liberty to France as a gift to the French people, if any of them can be found to accept it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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