Philadelphia PA-- Condoleeza Rice was obviously insane and very distressed as she addressed a small noontime crowd in front of City Hall today. The speech was made in front of homeless people, lost tourists and bored pigeons.
Ms. Rice wore an aluminium hat, dirty clothes and jumped up and down on a pogo stick. Her speech was a final warning about a pending alien cataclysm scheduled for 08/08/08. Ms. Rice spoke to the crowd and also directly to this intrepid TheSpoof.com reporter.
"My fellow Americans, the end is near. Months ago I warned of an invasion from my nemesis, Osama bin Spaghettios and his army. Today, it happened."
Suddenly, a hawk swooped down from the crown of City Hall and quickly ate a hapless pigeon. Ms. Rice looked at the scene and shrieked.
"That's an alien, it's going to eat all of us next!!"
The crowd turned away. Even the homeless people were bored by her psychotic ramblings. Ms. Rice continued hopping up and down on the pogo stick and spoke to this reporter directly:
"Mr. Fish!!" she yelled. "You must warn them, they are already here and already eating peop--ahhhhhhhhhh!"
Just then, Osama bin Spaghettios himself appeared out of nowhere and gobbled up the both of them.
"Who doesn't like rice and fish?" Said the amiable alien.