Print this
Topics: Penis, History, Napoleon

Sunday, 6 July 2008

image for Historians Learn that Napoleon Had Fifteen Inch Penis
"He kept his package in his shirt for easy access."

Researchers at the Graduate School for French History in Paris have learned that Napoleon Bonaparte had a previously unknown fifteen inch long (while flacid) penis. This was discovered when early tin and glass photographs of Napolean and Josephine were discovered by archaeologists digging underneath a former Paris whorehouse.

Said visiting professor Dolph Schmiddt of Bonn, "no wonder Josephine is always seen smiling and happy in all of the paintings."

This also answers the mystery of why Napoleon's hand was always inside of his jacket. "He wasn't trying to hide a hand malady or scratch an itch or rest a broken arm in a shirt sling. He was playing pocket pool a little farther north. He kept his package in his shirt for easy access!"

"It is also obvious that Bonaparte really wasn't your average Frog. With equipment like that, he was probably one real horny toad."

Napoleon is now being referred to in Paris as the "original French Tickler."

Make Throckmorton Turdblossom's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 2 multiplied by 1?

5 13 24 2
54 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more