Robert Mugabe, the zany African dictator, has been called the Blackest Leader in the World, by UN leaders at an emergency meeting of the African Union in Egypt today, says Wonkey Moods.
The extraordinary meeting in Cairo was convened to discuss what to do about the renegade black nutcase after Mr Mugabe's Zanu PF party romped home unopposed in the country's elections, when opposition leader Morgan Tsvangirai, himself quite black, bowed out of the race for the leadership.
Mr Tsvangirai told his supporters before the election last Friday:
"How can I compete with a man covered in creosote?"
Mr Mugabe, who was yesterday inaugurated for the sixth time as leader of Zimbabwe, is so black, that he cannot be seen after 7pm without the aid of floodlights, it was claimed.
His supporters agree, and claim that, not only is he the blackest leader in their history, but he is also "getting blacker".
Experts say that should Mr Mugabe get much blacker, he will become a Black Hole, with a gravitational field so powerful, that nothing, not even light, would be able to escape his pull, having fallen past his event horizon.