Written by Tragic Rabbit
Print this
Topics: Nazi, Germany, Theme Park

Friday, 20 June 2008

image for Munich opens long-awaited Nazi-Land theme park to record crowds
Tourists enjoy the Blitzkrieg roller coaster - it's fast! it's terrifying! it's German!

Germans flocking from all over Europe just can't get enough of the exciting rides and realistic Adolf Hitler exhibits in the newly opened state-of-the-art theme park Nazi-Land.

The six-billion Euro theme park opened yesterday in Munich, the southern German city where their beloved dictator nurtured his watercolour skills, the fledgling Nazi Party and those charming and irrepressible dreams of world domination for which the German people are renowned.

The guided walking tours begin with photo galleries of little Adolf as a baby and several of his 1913 drawings and paintings. The tours then take sightseers past recreations of, for example, the Reichstag Fire burning in miniature and wax displays of Adolf Hitler signing the Enabling Act that cemented his place in the 1930s pantheon of German government.

Aside from the guided tours, tourists are furnished with a colourful map showing all the various points of interest, museums and exhibits, with little swastikas marking the many gift shops and toilets.

Thrill seekers can 'invade' France by boarding The Blitzkrieg rollercoaster, billed as the fastest ride on land or sea, and then disembark right into a recreation of occupied Paris!

Inside a palace built for Hitler overlooking the Koenigsplatz, the tourists can admire the imposing red-marble staircase. The palace is one of the few Nazi-style buildings still standing in the city.

The background music throughout the theme park's various museums, recreations and displays is taken from the operas of Hitler's favorite composer: Richard Wagner.

In a special section of Nazi-Land, the world-famous Hofbraeuhaus beer hall is recreated life-size and a thrillingly realistic animatronic Adolf Hitler gives his first public speech, originally delivered in 1918, at thirty minute intervals. Across the street is an authentic recreation of the pub Schellingsalon, where a brooding young Hitler frequently drank to excess and seldom paid his bar bill.

One of many Nazi-Land guided tours follows Adolf from his beginnings and through his rise to Fuehrer of the Third Reich, all faithfully recreated in thrilling dioramas and interactive exhibits.

Guides conduct tours with a maximum of 25 paying visitors on each Third Reich Tour. Tour ticket prices begin at a modest 400 Euros.

"We wanted to find out more about Hitler," enthused one holidaymaker, a Berliner whose family had saved for months to attend the grand opening of Nazi-Land.

Others on the walk were a Polish family with two toddlers, several US teenage skin-heads and three older gentlemen proudly wearing their Hitler-Jugend badges and moth-eaten caps.

Many of the theme park visitors also take the tramway to visit the nearby reconstructed Dachau concentration camp museum and gift shop. The Dachau section also offers rooms suitable for conventions or parties, available for year-round rental. Catering provided at extra charge.

The Nazi period rouses such pride among modern Germans and Nazi sympathizers that few would turn down a weekend visit to Nazi-Land as part of a happy holiday.

Call today to book your family's visit!

Make Tragic Rabbit's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 multiplied by 4?

1 20 16 21
41 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more