Written by kungfuiceskater
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Tuesday, 11 May 2004

image for The Swan: Michael Jackson to Make Guest Appearance In Hit Fox Reality Show
The Swan's Newest Contestant

The King of Pop has agreed to appear in Fox's new reality TV show where contestants receive the physical and emotional "makeover of a lifetime". Writer KungFu IceSkater was told that producers are having difficulties shooting the show because the King of Pop has been overly demanding of the services of the show's expert therapists, beauticians, and cosmetic surgery professionals.

The cast of beauty and healthcare professionals has mixed reaction to "Mike's" progress. Mental therapist, Anna Lyze, said, "He hasn't quite gotten over the Scary Movie 3 cameo, but I can work with him. I don't think he has any other imminent, pressing issues to deal with. Does he?" Fitness trainer, Iran Miles said, "I just don't know which class to put him in. Boxing isn't going to work; I'd be too ashamed to be seen bench pressing with him. One of my buddies suggested putting him in a kiddy class. Yeah…..like that's gonna happen." Plastic Surgeon, Doctor Frank Stein said, "I don't have enough liability insurance to cover me with Mike. By the way I never really asked is that his face or a Haitian Voodoo mask he's wearing? It's probably a mask, right?"

Michael Jackson could not be reached for comment but has issued the following statement, "I'm offended that those white-oppressor show producers got my ethnicity wrong. I mean isn't it more than obvious that I'm a caucasian that has infiltrated the Nation of Islam?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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