Voted worst President ever by political pundits and seventy percent of America, Mr. Bush, 'Commander in Chief' number 43, wants to be remembered for his cojones (balls), sensitivity, numerous accomplishments, and hard work. "Now, I'll get the chance and to finally 'get in the face'" of what he calls American ingrates (sound a bit like Der Führer?).
And, what better way to be remembered than a silver screen bio?
Our Chief War Monger said, as he put 'His Pet Goat' back into a bookcase, "They thew shit at me for 8 years, come January, 2009. SOBs and that New York Times liberal Commie rag will hear from Georgie Boy. Georgie will tell 'em like it was. That 'JFK' flick will be a zero compared to my courage. And, 'The Passion of the Christ,' by that Tinsel Town Gibson shrimp...he can't even shoot film!"
While secretly learning the skills of his 'adversaries of Hollywod' in Der Cheney Bunker, Mr. Bush is writing the screenplay, casting the actors, planning to direct, and to produce his epic using his own funds. Learning about this bound-to-be fiasco, Mel Gibson was heard muttering to himself, "Shit damn, I make a great flick about real Biblical truth, and along comes President Idiot trying to film his way into history. Gimmee a break!"
Mr. Bush will play himself, justifying the choice by claiming he plays with himself every day, already. During an interview re his "Baby," he said, "You know, we live in dangerous times and I need some kind of catharsis after one of the 3 Stooges takes office," clearly referring to McCain, Obama, and Hillary.
And, our humble Commander in Chief feels he does not deserve an Academy Award for best actor in a leading role, and he may just let an LA 'geek' (his term) do the leading man's role. His short list includes Costner, Hoffman, Crowe, Nicholson, Harrelson, Gere, the younger Douglas, Sandler, Woody Allen, Depp, Pee Wee Herman, and a few others. Cameo appearances by a Nixon look-alike, Daddy Bush, and Billie Boy (aka Bubba) will be written into the script.
The Bush women, Laura, Jenna, and Barbara will play themselves. As Georgie Boy says, "Yes, you should see each Bush to know what I'm talkin' about. The 3 women will be real: horny Laura and loose, drunk, and horny college coeds, Jenna and Barbara."
Filming will begin in January, 2010 at Universal Studios with a complete mock-up of the interior and exterior of the White House. Georgie will finance the film at a cost of $150 million.