Houston, TX. - A simple rain shower. That's all it took to end a 46 year masquerade, the political career of Senator Barack Obama, and his hopes of becoming America's first black President.
At a rally in Houston this morning, a sudden cloudburst revealed the fact that beneath a layer of carefully applied, but inexplicably water-soluble make-up, Barack Obama is in fact, a white man, masquerading as a half-black man.
"We're stunned," said Obama's former campaign manager. "He had us all fooled."
But why did Barack Obama spend his entire life masquerading as a half black man? That's the question burning in the minds of many of Obama's loyal supporters, who ask "Why, Barack? Why?"
The answer can be found 46 years ago in the Nyanza Province of Kenya, when Barack's Mother, Ann Dunham was married to the handsome and charismatic Barack Obama Sr., who is the supposed father of Barack Obama, Jr.
However, unbeknownst to Obama Sr., Ann Dunham entered into an illicit affair with a white missionary. And when she became pregnant, she feared for her relationship with Obama, and dreaded the day when he would see the baby for the first time and exclaim, "Hey! How come he's WHITE?"
So, after consulting a local Kenyan medicine woman, Ann Dunham began drinking vast quantities of molasses, and on the day he was born she covered the baby with pine tar, which completely fooled her proud, but gullible Kenyan husband.
Since then, Ann Dunham has lived a lie. Telling everyone, including her own son that he was half-black. First, with the application of pine tar, and later with more sophisticated American make-up,
To Barack Obama's credit, he apparentlty never knew he wasn't half-black. His mother, Ann Dunham had apparently lied to her son, telling him that he had a rare skin disorder that required the application of special "skin medicine."
And as the rain came down at the Houston Texas rally, and his make-up began to run, Barack was apparently as shocked as anyone. exclaiming "Hey! How come I'm WHITE?"