Written by carina-eta

Print this
Topics: keira knightley

Sunday, 10 February 2008

image for Keira Knightley Rejects Bafta and Oscar at Awards Ceremony
New Bafta Design For Next Year

Keira Knightley has today vowed that she will not accept either Baftas or Oscars for her role in romantic British drama Atonement.

The film has been nominated for 14 Bafta awards and is expected to sweep the boards across the Atlantic and in the U.K.

Miss Knightley has sensationally rejected the awards due to the tiny statuettes being "too fat." Following last years awards, during which Miss Knightley failed to pick up an award, due to it being too heavy, she has opted to avoid any further embarrassment by refusing any future awards.

"They are all so chubby,"she pointed out,"look at them, all lined up along the mantlepiece with their fat little cheeks and curvy butts, I just can't bear to look at them."

The average award is said to weigh four pounds, 1.5 pounds heavier than Miss Knightley.

Co-star James McAvoy was this evening said to be amused at Keira's stance, saying," She was difficult to work with, particularly when she turned sideways. She may have won a lot of acclaim, but she carries no weight as an actress, in acting circles she's just a lightweight."

Make carina-eta's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 2 plus 1?

4 3 16 23

Go to top