In an uncanny contemporary parallel to Jonathan Swift's Gulliver's Travels, Shiite and Sunni legislators in the Iraqi Parliament have nearly come to blows over the correct way to eat a soft boiled egg.
GW Bush has flown to Baghdad to personally try to mediate the conflict. Apparently the worst President, as he is now known throughout the US and the world, thinks that he may salvage a modicum of respect if he can bring the warring parties together in the egg dispute.
Bush was overheard urging the opposing sect leaders: "For Allah's sake can't we just get along. Do you have any idea what an embarrassment I am to my parents? Never mind that Cheney thinks I'm a wimp, Condie no longer fantasizes that I'm her husband and Karl Rove has totally jumped ship? It's only an egg!"
Muhammad Ovariis, Secretary General of the Iraqi Egg Council retorted: "Only an egg?! My Ass! This is a potential life and I cannot believe that the so-called Pro-Life worst President cannot see that a sacred life, animal, vegetable or mineral should be eaten with a respectful crack along the upper half of the egg surface"
Muhammed Ovariis, Secretary General of the Iraqi Egg Conglomerate opposed the Bush reductionist egg philosophy as well. "Only an egg?! I suppose he goes to his Religious Conservative base and says only a fetus. Everyone knows that an egg must be eaten with a crack to the bottom half! Even Bush should know that! "
Bush tried one last conciliatory proposal: "Throughout my administration, I have scrambled things, maybe this will work in Iraq!"