Heathrow Airport - (Mile High Mess): An Air Canada pilot screamed at passengers through the plane's PA system that he "had just fellated God in the cockpit" and had received divine revelations during orgasm, according to psychiatric reports.
The apparently sober co-pilot of a Toronto-London flight "then went bonkers, tearing off his clothes and singing the Battle Hymn of the Republic" before being forcibly restrained in the plane's broom cupboard, a mental health tribunal in Shannon Hospital heaqrd today.
"He was invoking the Almighty," one witness told the tribunal, "and quoting from the Old Testament - passages about Onan spilling his seed."
Some passengers started to feel unwell when the PA system couldn't be turned off.
The plane had to make an emergency touchdown in Ireland's Knock Airport where a posse of religious tourists met the pilot, begging for autographs and tearing at his clothing in a bid to grab some miraculous souvenirs.
Air Canada spokesmen reported that this was the first admitted incident of its kind "although we've had a number of mid-flight religious conversions linked to hallucinogen intake."
The pilot has been placed on indefinite sick leave.