European and Asian stocks have risen after French bank Societe De Robespiere admitted that Frenchman Monsieur Le Grande Theft Auto, 19, had lost tens of billions of euros playing the French version of Deal Or No Deal.
A bank official confirmed that Le Grande Theft Auto's losses had reached a staggering £60billion. The witch hunt came after the US placed a single bet of $150bn (£76bn) on the 3:30 at Newmarket which it won.
Relief over US racing success was overshadowed by the massive French fraud. With millions of hard working US consumers getting tax rebates, the hope is that the US will be able to blame the idle rogue Frenchman for absolutely everything.
In spite of the French banking cock-up, confidence in banks worldwide appeared to be strangely unaffected after the rogue French trader was hounded out.
Are you a small investor? Do you work at a financial institution and are worried that the Frenchman has put your job in jeopardy, or have you recently been made redundant because of the French farce?