Paris, France - (Bare Ass Mess): Italian topless model Carla Brunei has dumped her French president lover Nicholas Sarkozy and shacked up with a "loaded Russian oligarch" in an Ile St Louis apartment according to reports from Paris today.
Brunei, who recently released a porno internet video of herself and Sarkozy "screwing over the EU" in a three-way orgy featuring a cameo role for her cousin Prince Jefri Archer of Brunei, is said to have moved on after being told she wasn't allowed to travel to India in her capacity as official maitresse en titre during a forthcoming state visit by the French leader.
"Nicholas was always a puny shortarse," Brunei said today, "much like Napoleon and Hitler.
"Sure we had a good time while it lasted.
"But he's broke after a messy divorce and the French people now hate him.
"So it's Bonjour Tristesse and Au Revoir! My new lover owns half the liquified natural gas reserves in Siberia. Ciao!"