Pakistan, Ratters: Following the assassination of Benazir Bhutto, the former prime minister of Pakistan in the evening of December 27th, there will be no celebrations in the streets of Pakistan to usher in the New Year, except for maybe at the President's residence. However it is highly unlikely, as the President is a military leader and will only be receptive to fancy dress balls.
Immediately after smirking in delight upon hearing the tragic news, President Musharraf's face bore shock as he witnessed people on television chanting his name and making references to animals and villains from movies he had grown to love. This incident comes as an serious blow for the people of Pakistan who had dreamed of finally having a democratic government.
Sources claimed that the bullets shot at Ms Benazir Bhutto came from a sniper gun. Knowing fully that militant groups conduct no target practice training sessions, it became evident that the shots had been made by expert marksmen and fingers were immediately pointed at the army.
As President Musharraf excused himself from the press conference, our reporter reportedly followed him to the men's room. However, the only words we could get out of the personal assistant to the President, amidst all the grunts were, 'Oh My God! That's a big one! Try harder sir. Come on! You can do it!'
*Author's Note: This is the spoof of a news story, at a website exclusive to the publishing of such satires, created to satisfy the writer's insatiable need to be loquacious. They are not meant to have any implications in the real world and are certainly not a reflection of the same. Therefore, I must request you (the reader) to kindly leave all your emotions, except for amusement, outside the door. If such articles disturb you, please refrain from reading them. These stories are not meant for pregnant women as well as children and in rare cases, pregnant children...