Written by Jesus Budda
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Monday, 17 December 2007

image for Muslims enjoy Dancing spectacular in Mecca
The pilgrims will not be happy campers when they find out this is the only food left

The annual haj pilgrimage began in Mecca on Monday when hundreds of thousands of Muslim pilgrims put on their dancing shoes for a big 'ol shindig.

In central Mecca, some late comers performed the ritual walk seven times around the Kaaba, the ancient cubic shrine which all Muslims face when they perform their daily prayers.

More than 1.6 million pilgrims have come to Saudi Arabia from abroad for the haj, the largest regular religious gathering in the world - apart from the annual Rolling Stones 'final' tour shows - and an obligation which all Muslims should perform at least once if they are able to. Twice is preferred. Three times and you get a coupon for free drinks at nite-spot Rock the Kasbah.

Pilgrims perform a whole host of dance moves including the difficult to master 'robot', while others simply stand on the sidelines clapping and singing sea shantys.

"I performed my first head spin and back-flip," Health Minister Hamad al-Manei told MTV -Middle East, the popular broadcaster which has been permitted to cover the rites this year.

"Look at me, I'm sweating like a stinking pig American! Look at my big fat red face. I look like John Candy after a marathon. ," joked the minister.

The main event see's all the pilgrims gathering for a massive game of Ring-a-ring-a-rosies-a pocket-full-of-posies, in which they dance non-stop for up to 24 consecutive hours.

"You must be very, very fit to partake", said muslim convert Bill O Reilly, "of course the kids don't have to dance for the whole 24 hour period. They can take a nap at sundown".

Mecca's restaurants and stores are bracing themselves for huge sales. A local toy store owner had this to say:

"Mecca is famous for it's Meccano sets. Of course not many people outside of Saudi Arabia are aware that every single piece of Meccanno is made in this very city. The pilgims always buy a set to bring back home".

So far, no arrests have been made, despite the huge numbers of people. Two received warnings for illegal line-dance moves to a Billy-Ray Cyrus song which contravened the mood of the pilgrimage. They were sent home in disgrace and had their stetsons impounded.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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