Denouncing Pakistan's suspension from the Commonwealth, Friday, an angry Musharraf accused the 53-nation group of making an "unjustified and unreasonable" decision.
Speaking through the puppet body of his new Foreign Minister, Musharraf screamed: "The decision does not take into account the objective conditions prevailing in Pakistan. The emergency was a necessary measure to avert a serious internal crisis which is being addressed and the situation is now returning towards normalcy".
Having thrown a royal tantrum in which he pounded his feet on the floor and smashed his head on the pavement, General Mush then changed from fatigues into a spanking new uniform, pressed to a crisp by the Mrs. (hovering in the background). With tears streaming down his face the 'commando-guy" wailed crocodile tears:
"What is the matter with these Commonwealth guys, why can they not trust me when I say 'maybe" I will "take off' my uniform in a few days; I might remove the emergency after the elections, within a few days I intend to free the judges, lawyers, human rights activists, that I am the only true democrat in all of Pakistan.
Haven't I convinced Dubya Bush (and boy - have I got him by the 'you-know-what!) Even that Negroponte - the creator of chaos in Central America - went to Plan C.
If I can bluff the Americans with my command of the English language and regular usage of vague, ambiguous, obfuscating terms like Maybe, Might, Could, In a few Days, I can't understand why these Commonwealth old farts can't be fooled.. Who do they think they are - inventors of the English language?
Even Canada that was pretending to be my friend and that goofy Gordon Brown - they all betrayed me. They are the NEW ENEMY. Well, they will pay for not choosing me on their team. Pakistan has its nooklur bums. I'll teach those Europeans and Africans. I'll give them a befitting reply.
I am now going to issue a new ordinance banning the Commonwealth as a Terrorist Organisation and Enemy of Pakistan..
They have a choice - they are either with us or against us.
I have already contacted Burma, Fiji and Zimbabwe to form out own team of GL4 - General Liars 4 - we will be a Farce to be reckoned with. The world stands warned!!!!
[And while I'm at it I also want to warn those writers at The Spoof.com - if they continue to poke fun at me I will ban them completely]
I Pharoah Pervez do decree this - So it shall be written, so it shall be done!"