Written by Kerfuffle
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Monday, 19 November 2007

Bear Grylls, star of the hit reality TV show 'Man VS Wild', mountaineer and ex British special forces operative, has become embroiled in a shocking row following allegations of anthropomorphism by 'Survivorman' star Les Stroud.

Stroud claims that upon having beaten a bear into submission on a mountain overlooking a top secret military research facility where Stroud is currently testing biological mutagens for the US Military, it promptly morphed into non other than Bear Grylls - "naked as a baby".

The bear had been spotted attempting to navigate the military compound`s perimeter defense by Pvt. Jarhead, 26, who stated he "engaged code Stroud" by playing 'Eye of the Tiger' over the compound`s intercom.

Of the reasons for Grylls` presence said Stroud "at first he was hesitant to relinquish, but when I threatened to have his flight downgraded to economy class he was more forthcoming".

Grylls` legal representative confirmed today that The Bear is being charged with espionage as an enemy combatant and is being detained at Guantanamo Bay.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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