It was announced earlier this morning that the formidable rap royalty collaboration Jay-Z and Beyonce plan to expand their empire to another level with the extension of their brand to a whole new currency.
The dollar has been losing its kudos since supermodel Gisele dissed it and announced that the Euro was officially the most blinging note to be seen flashing around Rio de Janeiro. Celebrities have begun to endorse alternative currencies, with Donald Trump bigging up the Japanese Yen and one celebrated hip-hop star adopting the new moniker 'Fiddy Pence'.
The US economy is preparing for catastrophe when this new currency, the Boom hits the market in early December. With the dollar at an all-time-low, banks are already being overrun with demands from desperate customers scrabbling to discard their Bucks in favour of Boomz. The decadent new notes have been designed in collaboration with Donatella Versace and will feature an image of the glorious Beyonce butt embossed in gold leaf.
A star-studded press conference and champagne reception set to be hosted by the couple later today will make the news official. The White House is yet to release an official statement on its position but, as a spokesperson for George W Bush has revealed, the President has been forced to concede that 'Biggie was right' after all.