Written by Jesus Budda
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Monday, 22 October 2007

image for So-Cal Fires may have been started by Ellen
Ellen DeGeneres, Fire

The wild fires wrecking havoc across Southern California may have been stared deliberately by funny woman chat show host Ellen DeGeneres.

The motive being put forward by LAPD sources is that Ellen, distraught over the handing back to Mutts & Moms of the little dog she gave to her hairstylist, sought revenge by hijacking a cop car, taking it on a joyride into the hillside and setting fire to it. The subsequent blaze went out of control and set alight the brush which in turn became the inferno which now - ironically - threatens the famous lesbians own home.

"We had a serious incident involving the stealing of an LAPD vehicle", said Sergent Willis Rodney, "the hijacker fits the description of a female caucasian talk show host seen prowling the area minutes earlier. We believe that this individual was Miss DeGeneres".

"That is absolute bull-dooey", said DeGeneres who was suspiciously nursing burnt fingers and had black smoke all over her face, "Would I really do such a thing? Heck no!".

"She had motive, time and the means to pull this off", continued Sgt Rodney, "she's unstable. Didn't you see her crying on the TV? Sh*t, it's just a damn dawg!"

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