In yet another setback to China's international commerce industry, a huge shipment of lead pipes sent to the U.S. has been shown to contain lead.
Federal officials immediately issued a recall.
"This latest episode is disgraceful," said FDA spokesman P.B. Waite. "If these pipes had made their way into our infrastructure, god only knows what might have happened. What's next? Lead in our pencils?"
In a related story, Superman is rumored to be suffering from extreme depression in recent months. Lead is the only substance which can protect the man of steel from Kryptonite, and his most recent order of lead suits has been held up at the border due to suspicion of lead contamination.