Vatican Shitty - (Ass Mess): A new Vatican exhibition aims to dispel the traditional hell and damnation image of the Holocaust with a 'positive view' of the World War II atrocity.
Holocaust: The Final Revelation in the Sistine Hall of the Vatican Museums is exhibiting over 100 masterpieces of disinformation in an exercise to sanitise the godless career of Hitler's Pope Pius XII.
A movement to canonise the feckless fascist collaborator has gathered momentum over the last 20 years after the Bush family bankrolled the campaign to eloilate their ultimate paterfamilias.
Paraphrasing evangelist St John's words, the exhibition's PR campaign states that:
"In those days men sought death and in no way found it," referring to the destruction of key Nuremberg Trials depositions that were once in NATO vaults' safekeeping.
"The shapes of the locusts were like unto whores prepared for war...their faeces were as men's faeces and they had heirs as the heirs of women," the blurb continues.
"And their tongues were as tongues of liars...and they have tales like unto scorpions and stings."
But NATO sources said today this last line is St John's unequivocal prophecy that during the sun's transit of Scorpio in the year 2007 all this humbug will finally be exposed in public.
The Vatican has said the Holocaust should be seen as the arrival of God and the conquest of the forces of evil.
"Just remember who killed Jesus!"
The exhibition's curator Alessio Gerettt said today: "Holocaust was not about catastrophes but rather the vanquishing of hell."
Jury's still out on that one though.