World, Wide and Web, the international conglomerate responsible for the running of the internet today announced that on midnight of 14th October 2007, for the first time ever in its history, the entire internet would have to be closed for 'deep cleaning' following the publication of what many regard to be the most offensive article ever written.
The 120 word article appeared on TheSpoof.com satirical news website at 10:50AM Greenwich Meantime and was subsequently removed at 10:50 and 28 seconds when a vigilant Spoof editor noticed it. He is expected to make a full recovery.
Although we cannot go into the detail of the article itself, suffice to say that in its brief appearance on the public domain, it has offended every majority and minority group on earth including Christians, Muslims, Jews, Political Parties and Scientists as well as people from all nations except, for some strange reason, Andorra.
"Some of the practices described were what I would even consider, a little inappropriate," said a Sado-masochistic Satanist. "You have to draw the line somewhere,"
Even Chris Morris, British Television's King of shock tactical comedy was supportive of the decision to remove the article. He issued a statement through his representatives. "I'm all for free speech but frankly, this was just unhygenic. And as for the pigs...well!"
WWW expect the internet to be closed for a day while they remove every reference and link to the offensive news story. It is expected that all servers will have to be thoroughly scrubbed to ensure absolute removal.
"We have no doubt that internet users will try and find the offending article. At the moment it is first on the list for anyone 'Googling' the search terms 'smegma' and 'Condoleezza Rice.'" said a representative from WWW Corp. "This is why it is imperative that every single reference to the article is destroyed so that it will never ever offend anyone ever again."
Despite the chaos that the writer of the article, an arrogant self-publicist using the alias 'The Macster', has inflicted upon internet users and spammers across the globe, he was unrepentant and expressed surprise at the number of death threats that had been sent to him.
"It was really only just a bit of a laugh," He told journalists.